To Sail Beyond the Sunset
by xenowriter
Summary: Santa Fic Exchange I did! Ashley X Kaidan pairing that I did :) Pre Virmire


TO SAIL BEYOND THE SUNSET

"Hey, Chief, you have a sec?" Kaidan asked the brunette woman standing at her workstation as he approached.

Startled, Williams spun on her heel to see Alenko just a few feet away from her. His deep almond colored eyes appeared to be conflicted and direct. His facial expression was tense with his jaw clenched and his posture rigid. It seemed as if he was battling something internally. "Hey, Kaidan. Everything okay?" His demeanor really concerned her since he didn't seem as frazzled from their mission debrief the previous day after departing from Feros.

Her question knocked him off guard and he rubbed the back of his neck nervously with his right hand as his left hand firmly grasped a small hard bound book at his hip. "Sure. Wanted to come down and chat before we gear up for our next landing on Virmire. T-That's all," His voice shook slightly. "Never thought we would actually be helping some Salarians. Those guys always are on top of their game."

"I didn't see them helping out the colonists on Feros." Ashley grumbled under her breath. The notion of aliens seeking their help, but turning their backs on humanity, really irked her. She didn't trust the aliens and the lot on the Normandy was really testing her beliefs and values. Shepard, on the other hand, maintained alliances with different council races to get backing from the Council. A must per Captain Anderson. Ashley didn't agree to this strategy and personally wouldn't have not taken that route. However, Commander Shepard was her superior officer and she put her trust in him ever since she joined up from Eden Prime. Like any fellow soldier, he saved her ass from a Geth attack. She developed feelings for him and she thought for sure it was mutual…this made her turn a blind eye towards her opinions of the aliens on their team. She recently found out that John had no intentions of being with her and chose Liara T'Soni instead. An Asari scientist they picked up on Therum who was Matriarch Benezia' s daughter. Ash acted like the rejection was nothing but a scratch on her armor, though deep down inside she was wounded. How could a human like John Shepard choose an alien over his own race?

Kaidan picked up on this and gave a teasing smirk. "Tell me how you really feel, Williams."

Embarrassed by her outburst, she felt her face become hot and quickly tightened her lip. "Sorry, LT." Thankfully, Wrex and Garrus were nowhere around, but then again, would she even care what they thought of her feelings towards them? Her eyes moved down to the book again with interest. "What brings you down here to the lowly peasants of the ship?" A crack. She didn't mind her workstation being near the weapons hold, but the bottom of the ship was always considered "the lower man of the totem pole's position."

Kaidan pretended to glance around. "Wrex and Garrus not around?"

"They went up to the Mess to grab some food."

"That's surprising. I didn't think those two would be socializing together given their races' history." Alenko commented. Privately, he already knew where they were. He observed their location when he left his quarters to head down to where Ashley was to talk with her. He wanted the time alone. He didn't want to be forced to say what he wanted to get off his chest in front of anyone else. Williams' responses to him were very short in a non-curt manner. There were no ill feelings towards him, but he knew the reasoning behind it. Word on the ship was that Ash confronted John after she learned that he was hanging around Liara more. Williams was a very straight up type of woman and Kaidan believed that she would have even called the Commander out in front of the entire crew if it came to that. "You doing okay?" The question was vague, but his tone hinted at what he was getting at.

"You heard of that too?" Ashley sighed hard. "I wish everyone would just mind their damn business. If the Commander wants an Asari, then that's fine." Jealously oozing out of her pink lips like saliva. Her eyes narrowed at him. "You came down here to bring that up?"

Realizing that the conversation was going in the direction that he didn't intend, he held up his hand in a panic and took a few steps back. "No, no! Shit. Okay. This isn't what I wanted." His mind whirled like a maelstrom making it impossible to gather his thoughts on what he wanted to say further.

Seeing him flustered made Ashley cock her head to the right to look at him quizzically. "Then why are you here?" Her tone less sharp.

Glancing down and seeing the book still in hand, Kaidan regained his composure and took a breath slowly. "We have been dealing with a lot lately and it seems like we are getting closer to Saren."

"Yep. That Turian bastard is going down."

"Feros was rough. That Thorian. I-I don't even know how we beat it."

"We kicked it's ass." Ashley gave a playful grin.

This aroused a chuckle from Alenko' s mouth. "That we did, Chief. Going up against Saren won't be easy. I-I just thought…" A pause. He glanced down to the book again. "I thought I would find some calm before the storm. You know?" He gingerly handed the book to her. "I picked this up for you. I read in your profile that- "Stopping shortly, realizing that he was disclosing more than what he wanted to share. "I heard you like this guy."

Reading the title, "Ulysses." Ashley smiled warmly as her fingertips traced the cover, moving over the engraving. "This is…."

"A relic." Alenko chuckled. "Picked it up at a book emporium on the Citadel at our last dock. "

Lifting the cover open, Ashley silently read a few lines at the first page and stopped with tears in her eyes. "Dad and I used to read this every night. If he couldn't make it to a call, I'd record myself and send it to him."

"_'__To sail beyond the sunset and the baths of all western stars until I die_.'" Kaidan recited one line he particularly picked out with an ear to ear grin on his face.

The quotation moved her, and Ashley giggled a little to avoid a choke in her voice. "One of dad's favorite verses. Thanks, LT…I-I don't know what to say…"

"Like I said, we have a hard fight coming ahead. Thought you needed a little me time before you gear up."

Nodding her head, Ashley gripped the book tightly in remembrance of the special bond she had with her father and the warming sensation in knowing that someone standing in front of her took the time to think of her. Moved by his gesture, Williams leaned over and gently kissed him on the cheek, letting the warm breath out of her lips linger on his shaven skin. "Thank you…" She whispered.

With his heart rapidly pounding in his chest, Alenko felt a lump in his throat that prevented him from talking right away. Clearing his throat, he smiled again. "You're welcome, Chief. See you at o' nine hundred?"

"Ten Four," The smile remained on her face as she saluted.

Post Virmire...

Kaidan forced himself to move in the cargo hold after debriefing as he neared her deserted workstation. A small ounce of hope plagued his thoughts. The whole ordeal was a nightmare. Ashley would be standing there dutifully, working away and her demise on Virmire would be just a false report. She had to escape. She had to make it out of there. Instead, the darkened reality set in and nobody stood in her spot. The book "Ulysses" was still sitting on her table from placement after her read. Seeing it made him think back to just hours before when he gave the gift. He wanted to tell her more, so much more. He held back and now there would be no time left to say what he needed to say. Flipping the book open to the page he memorized with the passage, he allowed his finger to move down to the words. "_To sail beyond the sunset and the baths of all western stars until I die_…" He choked as he read the verse out loud. His finger draped off the book as his fists clenched up at his sides. "Goodbye, Chief…I'll see you soon."


End file.
